As we look forward to going out for the first time in years to a New Years Eve party, we take note of the fact that for us, swinging, like life, is all about attitude. We don’t waste time looking backwards with regret or lamenting challenges we’ve met throughout the year. We never forget that we are living an amazing life and so we are, as always, looking forward to what next year will bring in our vanilla and swinging lifestyles.
This episode has three fairly commonly discussed topics, but with our listeners’ help we try to approach each with a slightly new perspective. We talk about what to do when you can’t get (or stay) hard during play, the best piece of advice for single females aspiring to be swinging unicorns, and the secret signals couples exchange to express interest in potential play partners.
While unicorns are not necessarily our favorite play choice, we have had some awesome encounters with quite a few. In our diary story, we remember a slightly awkward playtime with a beautiful, but very selective single girl who joined us in a playroom at a house party and the way she enhanced our sexual experience that night.
Click this link to listen to Episode 55:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/idza6-80f8d2?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 55
Once again we have a listener question episode. Our listeners are always sending questions and topic suggestions and, since we certainly don’t have all the answers, occasionally we select three great inquiries to crowd-source the best advice.
In this episode we discuss the debrief conversations that we have on the car ride home and how they have actually lead to the creation this podcast. Then we gingerly talk about the challenging topic of being overweight and how it potentially affects your lifestyle experiences. Finally, we present a listener question that has appeared on our Kasidie Community wall and hear the responses of other listeners about whether or not its bad swinger etiquette for a guy not to orgasm during play.
Our journal entry is the story of a playtime encounter that was memorable to us because it was so peculiar. Never before have we had a play session in which our experiences were so completely different. For Penn, it was fantastic, energetic, exciting, fun, wild and amazing. For Paige, well, we’ll let her describe it for you. It made for a very interesting and challenging debrief on the long car ride home.
Click this link to listen to Episode 54:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/58npa-7f3572?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 54
We are still recovering from another fantastic Desire adventure. We had a great time meeting listeners and indulging ourselves in the opulent luxury that is the new Desire Villas. Just in time, the Thanksgiving holiday came right when we got home allowing us to rest and rebalance ourselves with family and friends. Although swinging is an amazingly fun hobby, our vanilla life is our true priority and we never want to forget it.
In this episode, our three topics discuss how much you really want to know about your play partners; the best advice for single men who want to get into the swinging lifestyle; and the tricky topic of adjusting your alcohol consumption if you think play is on the table for that night.
In our journal, we remember an encounter with a man who is that rare find; a charming, sexy, interesting, clean, reliable, respectful, classy, sexy, single guy. This memory is an example of how we view the valuable roll that single men can fill in our lifestyle and how they can truly enhance a mature, secure, committed couple’s love making.
Click this link to listen to Episode 53:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/shcs9-7dca02?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 53
Some day when we are 85, sitting in rocking chairs, sipping lemonade, and holding hands on our front porch, we want to be able to bring up these recordings, push play, and listen back to our stories as we knowingly smile and nod our heads to each other confirming to ourselves that… we lived! As a result we prefer to recollect the best of our experiences. Why remember the disappointments when the triumphs are so amazing? However, we realize that this show is more than just a diary of our memories for our own keeping. Its also a resource and many of our listeners need more than just the hot stories. They also need the real, balanced truth about swinging too. Hence, this episode’s story.
As always, we discuss crowd-sourced answers to three questions from our list. We talk about accidentally sexting vanilla friends, the uncomfortable topic of how to answer questions about work at swinger parties and whether or not its ok to lower your standards for play while on a lifestyle vacation, which brings back a tumultuous memory.
Swinging is an adventure for us and as such, we want to enjoy the ride no matter where it takes us. We never want to second-guess or dwell on experiences that don’t quite turn out the way we expected or even would have preferred, but in this episode we remember an encounter that honestly, we hate admitting is part of our swinging memories, Paige’s one regret.
Click this link to listen to Episode 52:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/wmbnr-7b805c?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 52
It’s the swingers’ high holy day, Halloween. To be truthful, Halloween blowouts aren’t our favorite swinger parties but on a few awesome occasions those newbie-filled, overcrowded, makeup-laced events have produced a some fantastic memories for us.
We have another three great questions for this episode, but in this show, the conversations about determining your swinger “number” and the best icebreaker games for swingers were almost lost in the deluge of answers we received about one of the most polarizing and opinion inducing questions we have explored. It seems that everybody has a opinion about… the bush!
In honor of Halloween and in preparation for this episode’s diary story, we listened back to one of our very first private swinger diary recordings. It made us both giggle and shake our heads at ourselves as we listened our wide-eyed recollections. The memory we heard, and now re-tell here, was about our very first swinger Halloween party and how, in one unexpected night, our “number” doubled, from one to two.
Click this link to listen to Episode 51:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/9hcxx-79c46c?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 51
When we pushed “record” for the first time, almost three years ago, we honestly didn’t think we would repeat the posting process 50 times, but here we are. This podcast started as our diary which we created to remember the amazing adventures that this lifestyle has provided, but it has grown into more than that. Now, its a resource for our audience and a priceless way to make connections between us and our listeners.
If we had to direct new listeners to our podcast toward just one episode to understand what we and this show are about, this is it. You might say this is our manifesto. In this ridiculously long episode, we tackle an epic challenge, to list the top 50 things that we and our listeners say are the best things about the swinging lifestyle. It was a huge endeavor. We dare you to try to take it all in!
One of the best parts of this show is the influence it has on explaining the joys and benefits of swinging to those who are curious and nervous. In this episode, we tell the story of how our podcast has aided the journey of one such couple. We are proud to have helped expose them to the wonders and pleasures of swinging and humbled to call them friends.
Click this link to listen to Episode 50:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/tvh5g-780617?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 50
As we approach the Episode 50 milestone, we announce the introduction of our new logo and renew our invitation for listeners to send us their lists of their favorite things about the swinging lifestyle for our upcoming Top 50 countdown.
As the title of this show suggests, in this episode we discuss listeners’ preferences for variety vs. having a “type” when it comes to play partners; the question of whether or not we could walk away from swinging and be content with only one partner for the rest of our lives; and some conversation about the nature of the term “vanilla” in the lifestyle.
All of our stories are very real, after all, they are our memories, but in this episode we talk about the motivations behind one of our encounters with a couple who were very unlike our usual type and the way that for us the swinging lifestyle is a fantastic vehicle to allow us to bond, blow off steam and continually renew our love and commitment to each other.
Click this link to listen to Episode 49:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/bp4hp-753f1c?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 49
We are back from a last minute Labor Day weekend trip to Florida where we snuck in some recon at a place thats been on our bucket list for a while, Caliente. We had a great time laying naked in the sunshine all day and partying all night. We do travel to some amazing lifestyle destinations and we’d love to have you to join us.
In this episode, in addition to answering our listeners’ questions about accepting compliments, using fake names, and the best playtime music in the swinging lifestyle; we announce an upcoming event that we need your help with. For our fast-approaching 50th Episode, we are compiling the top 50 things that we, and you our listeners, love about the swinging lifestyle. Send us your answers.
Our diary story is the memory of a classic playtime encounter in which the casual, honest, genuine connection and the perfect playtime environment, resulted in a rare and exciting play experience… twice!
Click this link to listen to Episode 48:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/aw2ru-737486?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 48
We are back from our amazing lifestyle cruise through the Mediterranean and we have so much to talk about! After skipping our usual release date in the middle of this month, we are bursting with stories and reviews of our journey. Please excuse the length of this episode. Although its a long one, we barely scratched the surface of all of our adventures and observations. After that trip, we will surely have diary stories for many years to come. After all, it was truly the trip of a lifetime.
True to our format, after recapping our fantastic swinger cruise, in this episode we discuss the question of how long it should take to get into swinging. We talk about tips and advice for keeping the sexy spark alive with a couple in anticipation of a date that is still far away. Then we expose our own occasional crisis of confidence and talk about when and why we sometimes think that we suck at swinging.
Though almost all of our diary entries are memories of our sexiest encounters, not every evening ends with mind-blowing orgasms. This journal entry is the memory of a night when we left the club with unfulfilled fantasies. Sometimes you just lose your mojo and when that happens, you have to wisely assess the situation, pack up, make a graceful exit, and know that there will always be more sexy opportunities in the future.
Click this link to listen to Episode 47:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/zecsb-713afa?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 47
As we excitedly pack our bags for our much anticipated Mediterranean swingers cruise, we are smashing every sexy outfit we own into the suitcases for what will be the longest vacation of our lives. Unfortunately there won’t be any room for podcasting equipment so, for the first time, we will only be releasing one episode in the upcoming month of August but we promise to return with stories of what is sure to be an epic adventure.
As always, in this episode we crowd source the answers to our three questions. We talk about the wisdom or folly of sticking to the plan of not playing on the first date. We discuss playing with couples who have a “no kissing” rule. Then we explore advice on how to occasionally explain to people, with whom you’ve been intimate at least once, that you don’t want to do it again.
Our diary story is from our very first encounters in the swinging lifestyle and the newbie excitements and challenges of exploring boundaries for the first time. Those first experiences are always emotionally charged and can lead to some awkward decisions and impulsive rules.
Click her to listen to Episode 46:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/pr3q7-6d9559?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 46
Please excuse our raspy smokers’ voices as we are still recovering from another awesome Naughty in N’awlins convention! Although we were flattered and humbled by meeting so many fans of our show at NiN who were curious about our impressions of the largest swingers convention in the world, as our regular listeners know, our format isn’t really about interviews or event reviews. Instead, we will leave it to all of other podcasting friends to offer their recount of the week. In our traditional style, rather than recapping all of the parties, friends, theme nights and playroom adventures we had, in this show we dive right into our three questions which were answered, as always, by you, our listeners.
This episode’s questions deal with how to handle that awkward transitional moment during play when the condoms come out, what to do if you get your period when you had a sexy encounter planned, and a sensitive, philosophical question about being “too slutty”.
Our diary story is part sexy memory, and part sobering lesson as we recall a quick connection and the powerful sexual momentum that resulted in an impulsive and hot playtime with a couple on a trip to Hedo Then we remember how we later second guessed ourselves about the experience after watching them interact with others. We cant deny it, for better or worse, like almost everybody in the swinging lifestyle, we are a little judgy.
Click here to listen to Episode 45:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/gug2s-6d03cd?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 45
Play preferences with circumcised men, soft swap finishes, and the vanilla world’s biggest misconception about the lifestyle; those are the topics discussed on this episode.
As always, we received so many great responses to our questions and, in particular, people had clear and passionate opinions on all the ways that the vanilla world misunderstands swinging. While we aren’t ready to be the poster-children for the swinging lifestyle, we do hope that our little podcast helps the cause of explaining the joys and wonders that swinging can bring to a healthy, mature, loving marriage.
In our diary story, we recall yet another of our many fantastic experiences at our favorite place on earth, Desire Resort in Cancun, Mexico. Our journal entry is the memory of our first ever soft swap experience with a couple who’s man had an uncircumcised cock. Bucket list… check!
Click here to listen to Episode 44:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/3zj3a-6c43f3?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 44
An overwhelming number of responses made this episode easy to record. Sometimes our questions solicit more replies than others but these questions must have touched a nerve because we had pages and pages of replies.
In this episode we discuss answers to the question about playing with bisexual people and the challenges and intimidations of that delicate situation. Then we give commentary about profile stats and tap dance on the narrow line of using an online profile to put your best foot forward but also the importance of being honest and accurate. Lastly, we explore the commonly heard and almost universally agreed trope that, “women run the lifestyle”.
In our diary story we remember an encounter with a comfortable, charming single man which allowed Paige to call all the shots and be the center of attention. This gentleman is one of those rarest of swingers; a classy, openminded, sexy, respectful single guy. Because we were all so comfortable with each other and he was so willing to please, this experience challenged the boundaries of Penn’s straight sensitivity, all in the interest of Paige’s pleasure.
Click here to listen to Episode 43:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/8v9pq-6bebe5?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Episode 43
One of the unexpected but wonderful advantages of this podcast has been the fantastic relationships we have developed with you, our listeners. Through your emails and social media messages, we have discovered that podcast listeners are indeed genuine, curious, engaged and often very sexy, a fact that we have recently verified.
For the first time in what is sure to be many more, in this episode we discuss three questions posed by you, our listeners. As always, we crowd-sourced the answers to your questions. Using other listeners advice as a guide, we discuss our own opinions and experiences about researching a couple on social media sites; the frequency and preference of using sex toys in swinging play; and one of the most common worries, the best language to use in order to tell a couple that you aren’t interested getting physical with them.
When we took a hiatus from podcasting last year, we were still very active in the swinging lifestyle. When we would come home from a party or date with new exciting memories, we were often disappointed and frustrated to know that we no longer had a podcast through which to re-live the night’s events. The stories would bubble up inside us and we felt like we just needed to tell somebody. Generously, our good friends the Joneses from the We Gotta Thing podcast allowed us to use them as our private audience during that time period and they became an occasional outlet for our stories. This episode’s diary story is one that we originally recorded for their ears only about a year and a half ago. It is a sexy story about an experience using a certain sex toy that was a first for us. It was such a hot memory that, rather than re-tell it, we just spliced the original, unfiltered version right here into this show. Hope you enjoy it.
Click here to listen to Episode 42:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/9d83t-6b616a?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener noreferrer”>Episode 42
With summer upon us and therefore kids out of school, we are trying to figure out how to adjust our habits a little to continue to preserve our sexy secrets from an always inquisitive family. We learned recently how frighteningly important that is. Despite the wonderful benefits of swinging, the vanilla world is not ready for our lifestyle no matter how amazing it is.
In this slightly longer than usual episode, as always we cover three new topics. We tell the story of our introduction to squirting and reflect on how our attitudes about it have developed and changed. Then, we talk about the practical problem of selecting the best alcohol for an evening of sexy fun. Finally, we explore the spectrum of what counts as dirty talk and what’s appropriate and preferred with a new partner.
Our diary story is a memory of one of the very first things we ever did in this lifestyle. Back when we were brand new and nervous, we made a road trip to visit a couple. While it was a sexy encounter, as four eager but inexperienced swingers will do, we made some classic, newbie mistakes.
Click here to listen to Episode 41:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/8gda6-6ad5ae?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener noreferrer”>Episode 41
This episode exposes the fact that some swinging questions are unanswerable. While we got lots of replies to our questions about the length of time for a play session, and a seemingly universal agreement about strip clubs, absolutely nobody seems to know why people enter the swingers clubs after 1:00 in the morning. Its still a mystery.
In this show, we give out our preferences and read some of your answers and then we announce that in the next episode we will be asking questions sent in by our listeners.
Our diary story is about a club night when we coyly flirted with a sexy couple and, taking advantage of the seductively erotic show in the playrooms and the right casual atmosphere for experimentation, we coaxed them into a wild, hot and very wet playtime.
Click this link to listen to Episode 40:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/bsx9n-6a460e?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener noreferrer”>Episode 40
Our quest to crowd source the answers to the unknown mysteries of the swinging lifestyle continues. We are excited about the dozens of responses we again received in order to help us answer our queries and we are thrilled by the surprising number of listeners who have written to pose new questions to ask our audience. We see a “listener question” episode coming soon.
In this episode we explore the puzzle of why so many swinging dating profiles have no pics of men. Then we spend some time talking about the personal preference to give or to receive oral sex with a new play partner. Finally, we explore the reasons our listeners say they enjoy lifestyle podcasts and what they get out of listening to them.
In our diary story, we remember an encounter that incorporates all three of this episode’s questions as we tell about a road trip to meet new friends and the unexpected situation that provided us a rare and exciting opportunity in which Penn was able to have a fantasy fulfilled that he didn’t even realize he had.
Click here to listen to Episode 39:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/zgv99-69c35e?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank”>Episode 39
Paige is not so crazy about these new episode titles but in this show, we answer our customary three questions and this time they deal with motorcycles, advice for curious adult children and the grey area of kissing and telling.
We rely heavily on listeners emails about their experiences with the motorcycle culture since we don’t have (or want) a bike. Then, we imagine the hypothetical world in which we had to give one of our six children advice about swinging. Lastly, as a couple with a podcast that describes the very intimate details of our sexy encounters, we try not to be too hypocritical in exploring the etiquette of how much detail is acceptable when we inevitably kiss and tell about our play experiences with others.
Our diary story is the memory of a Las Vegas getaway with Harley-Davidson loving friends and the unusual and steamy opportunity that exchanging hotel room keys provided us.
Click here to listen to Episode 38:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/jet8y-693af8?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank”>Episode 38
Recorded from the Passion Suite at Desire RM in Mexico, in this episode you’ll have to excuse our over-partied, raspy, smokers’ voices. Lets just say it was an intense week with the Lifestyle Lounge takeover group.
In answering this episodes’s questions, in this show we read listeners’ feedback and give our own opinions as we talk about smokers, reconnection sex and the best themes in the lifestyle. Thank you to all who contributed your opinions. Keep your replies coming. We need your advice.
Our diary entry is about a surprisingly selfish experience with a young, intimidated, newbie, single guy who willingly acted as the perfect playtoy for us.
Click her to listen to Episode 37:
https://www.podbean.com/media/player/q7sud-68b9d5?from=yiiadmin” target=”_blank”>Episode 37
Welcome to Book 2 of our diary. Recently, as we happened to come across one of our older episodes, we realized that in the past our show could rightfully be considered by some listeners to be a bit… shall we say, dry? Because up until now, we were purposefully and gingerly addressing an audience who are new to this awesome lifestyle, our shows were carefully scripted to give as much information as possible, but now our intended audience (and our style) shifts as we begin to discuss the more nuanced topics which are of interest to more experienced swingers.
Thank you all of you amazing responses to our first three questions. In this episode we talk about our opinions and your input on penis size, the sexy secret of swinging and same room play preferences. Please be sure to keep your advice coming. We need more opinions as we announce our next episode’s questions at the end of the show.
Our diary story is about an experience that touches on two of this episode’s questions. With a couple with whom we has a very special and intimate connection, a few years ago we explored the boundary of separate room play. As we expected, the excitement was intense but the emotional and logistic challenges were also very real.
Click here to listen to Episode 36:
As we wrap up Book One of our podcast, we answer the last of our initial newbie questions about the swinging lifestyle. Swinging is our hobby and like any other recreation, we are willing to spend a little money for our entertainment. How much to spend is a personal choice, but for us swinging is so fun and rewarding that we prioritize it and make room for it’s expenses in our budget.
In this episode we discuss the range of costs for the different swinging activities and as always, we give specific dollar amounts about what you can expect to pay for various events.
In an encounter that happened just a couple of days ago, our diary story is an example of one of the simplest experiences in the lifestyle and the fact that some of the hottest and most exciting memories cost absolutely nothing.
As we begin Book Two of our show, we need your help. We introduce the first three questions that will be discussed on our next episode in order to solicit advice from our audience. These are swinging queries that despite our years of experience, we still don’t know the answers to.
- Does penis size/shape really matter with a new play partner?
- Isn’t the fact that we all keep our adventures secret, part of the fun of swinging?
- Why are so many couples in the lifestyle “same room play” only?
Click this link to listen to Episode 35:
Big changes are coming to Swinger Diaries. As we approach 35 episodes, we feel as though we’ve accomplished our initial goal of answering the most common newbie questions through our show topics. Its now time for Book Two on our diary in which we turn our attention to more complicated, advanced and challenging swinger topics. In this episode, we announce an upcoming change to our format and make a request of our listeners who have gained something form our podcast.
We were introduced to the swinging lifestyle in baby steps through many trips to our favorite vacation resort, Desire, but in this episode we discuss alternate swinger vacations that don’t require such intense commitments of time and money as flying all the way to Mexico for sexy adult fun requires. We’ve visited clubs and parties all over North America and in this show we give tips and suggestions so you can craft your own awesome swinger vacation.
Sexy vacations are a rare and exciting opportunity to be adventurous and daring and our recent weekend in Toronto took us to a club on Cougar Night were Paige got the chance to fulfill a longtime bucket list fantasy.
Click this link to listen to Episode 34:
Because for us swinging is really like dating for couples, we always want to look our best and feel our best in order to have the confidence we need to make a great first impression on new friends. Unfortunately, like everyone else, we have our own body issues that we are constantly battling to overcome.
This is a very personal episode in which we openly discuss our own insecurities about our bodies. We talk about the efforts and commitments that we make in order to constantly improve our fitness, our self-image and our health and also about the way the lifestyle has encouraged us in that endeavor.
Our diary story is the memory of an encounter that we had on a swingers cruise with longtime friends that are so genuine and so dear to us that we could all completely and comfortably bare our bodies to each other without embarrassment or shame. That special level of connection that we have with each other made for an intimate, tender playtime and a uniquely personal swinging experience.
Click this link to listen to Episode 33:
Opening up a couple’s swinger bag is like digging through a woman’s purse. Its very personal. It exposes a lot about the people who own it. Its full of intimate private details about them and the way they play. Most swingers develop a bag of necessities for their lifestyle adventures. We have too.
Inspired by questions from listeners that ask about the details of our playtimes, and with the understanding that not all listeners invest the time to hear every one of our past shows for the answers which are covered in some of the previous shows, in this episode, to better understand our style and motivations in the swinging lifestyle, we open that bag.
After emptying the contents of our swinger bag, in our journal we remember a hot experience from our favorite place on Earth, the rooftop hot tub beds at Desire, which was enjoyed with a foursome that knew what they wanted and weren’t shy about asking for it. It was an intense evening for the senses and as always, we were happy we had our swinger bag handy. Easy accessibility to all of the critically important supplies it provides, made that playtime flow perfectly.
Click this link to listen to Episode 32:
In today’s digital age when we all carry camera phones with us at all times, we’ve become very used to the idea that it is common and safe to share our images freely with friends and on social media but when you get into swinging, privacy becomes a huge concern. Almost everyone in the swinging lifestyle keeps this part of their life a secret and would not want their friends and family knowing what they did last Saturday night.
In this episode, we talk about the two reasons we take sexy pictures in the swinging lifestyle, for sharing and for remembering. We discuss tips for taking good pictures in both situations and talk about suggestions for how, when, and with whom its appropriate and wise to share those pictures.
Our diary story is a special one. One of the many benefits of recording a podcast has been developing relationships with listeners and with other podcasters too. In this episode, we remember a recent surprise birthday party thrown for a new podcasting friend. Although we were the surprise gift to her, the evening with these sexy people became an amazing gift to us… and we’ve go the the pictures to prove it!
Click here to listen to Episode 31:
One of the touchiest topics in the swinging community is the subject of age and as a result we have avoided this topic for a long time now but if you’re new to swinging, you are understandably curious about this obvious question, “How old is too old and how young is too young to swing?”
While we hear plenty of politically correct answers to this question like, “You’re only as old as you feel” or “Age is just a number”, it is disingenuous and foolish to ignore the obvious fact that we are all attracted to a youthful appearance. Age actually is an important factor in the probability of making connections with people, both physically and socially. Its normal and even understandable that people tend to gravitate to others of their age range. Age does matter, but its not the only factor in making connections.
In our usual way, in this episode we talk plainly and directly about the range of ages of people that we have played with and also about the average age of the people you can expect to see in the lifestyle. In our sexy journal entry, we recall a date and playtime with a couple who was much younger than we were and remember the challenges that naturally occur between people of different ages and experience levels in the lifestyle.
Click this link to listen to Episode 30 :
Flirting is a skill and just like any other, if you don’t practice it regularly, you can get a little rusty. One of the first realizations for new swingers is that it’s probably been a long time since they’ve flirted with others and they often need to brush up on their moves.
In this episode, we remind listeners of the basics of flirting. We walk through what a typical evening in a club is like for us and talk about our personal flirting styles. As always, we give practice tips and techniques for moving from that awkward introduction phase to actually “sealing the deal”.
In our sexy journal entry, we recall a date with a charming, experienced, flirty couple which lit the fuse for a slow burn that eventually culminated in an inevitably explosive encounter.
Click this link to listen to episode 29:
Now, come on. The stereotype of the 70’s swingers is obviously, just not a reality anymore. In truth, as you might expect, swingers are actually very fashion savvy. After all, the whole reason swingers go out to parties and events is to meet new friends and make connections and we all know how important first impressions are.
Inspired by many emails from listeners asking us about what to wear to a swinger’s party, in this episode we talk about all aspects of swingers’ fashion. From jeans to dresses to lingerie and accessories, dressing smart for swinger events shows off your body’s best attributes and demonstrates respect for others. At a lifestyle party, it’s very important to dress to impress.
At a new hotel takeover, we were sadly disappointed by the crowd until we encountered some new friends who’s sexy style caught our attention right away. While the conditions in the playroom of the party were far from optimal for private, intimate, steamy, fun; this couple was so alluring to us that our wild encounter with them was irresistible.
Click this link to Listen to Episode 28:
The idea of an orgy is one of the most common fantasies that lures newbies into the lifestyle and it is true that the excitement of a pile of writhing naked skin really is as amazing as people imagine, but like everything in the lifestyle, orgies have their advantaged and disadvantages too.
In this episode we discuss the difference between group sex and orgies. We also talk about our experiences in orgies and what we like and don’t like about them. We explore tips to make your experience the best it can be and give some advice to avoid pitfalls when the fantasy becomes reality.
Our diary entry is a memory of an encounter with two other couples where distractions during play were a problem for us. We reflect on the tricky dance that inevitably happens in a playroom when not everybody in the orgy is equally attracted to each other. It’s a classic illustration of what to be prepared for when presented with the real-life opportunity to fulfill your orgy fantasy.
Click this link to listen to Episode 27:
We all have different faces that we use for various settings in our lives. We naturally change our styles and attitudes when we are at work, at church, at sporting events, in front of our kids, when we are relaxing with friends and even on lazy Sunday mornings. We all have many moods and many sides and for us, there is nothing more obvious than the difference between our “vanilla” personalities and our “swinger” personas.
In this episode we describe each other’s personalities in both settings and talk about how the lifestyle has affected our relationships with vanilla friends. We have a conversation about how to spot swingers in a vanilla setting and give a few tips that we use to improve that all-important skill of remembering people’s names when we have our full swinger “A-game” going.
Our sexy story is about an intense connection we made with a charming couple on a Swinger’s Cruise. Although the environment was tricky, they were patient with us and they gave us the time we needed to transition out of being Mom and Dad and become the fun, happy, party-loving couple that we are when we transform into our swinger alter-egos.
Click this link to Listen to Episode 26:
Fantasies are a huge part of everyone’s sex life and so many swingers get into the lifestyle to fulfill the fantasies they’ve developed through open conversation and pillow talk with their partner.
In this episode we discuss how our fantasies developed and how we began to realize that in the lifestyle, because exciting fantasies are so frequently fulfilled, many swingers actually begin to develop a whole list of experiences they would like to have. Like many swingers we have really developed two lists.
Usually we create our episodes by identifying a topic, writing the notes and then selecting a story from our past that illustrates the topic, but this time we have a story that is so amazing that we designed the topic around it. Listen as we remember how we got the chance to fulfill the fantasies of a very special friend as we checked some new things off our own list too. Of all of our experiences, this is one of our very favorite memories.
Click this link to listen to Episode 25:
As we say on just about all of our shows, one of the main reasons we started this podcast was to help curious, nervous newbies navigate their way into the wild, sexy, but daunting world of swinging, because we remember what it was like to be new, intimidated and very scared.
In this episode, we look back at our original fears and apprehensions about the lifestyle and we explore the question; if we could go back and talk to the frightened, timid, vanilla couple that we were when we stumbled into Desire years ago, what advice would we give ourselves? With that prompt, we offer the top 5 things that we, and all newbies, should, but probably don’t know about swingers and the lifestyle.
Our diary story is about an encounter with a newbie couple that actually pursued us in order to take their first steps into their swinging adventure and the way, as ambassadors for the lifestyle, we both let them down and gave them an amazing experience to remember.
Click here to listen to Episode 24
After a long sabbatical Penn and Paige are back!
In all honesty, when we said goodbye and signed off almost a year ago, we believed that was the permanent conclusion of our show but over the past few months a few unexpected things happened to us.
First was the flood of kind sentiments of support sent to us by email and on social media sites, most of them thanking us for the difference we had made in peoples’ lives and marriages. We had no idea how many people we had touched and we were very moved.
Then came a year of amazing experiences. Our swinging career has been very active even with the microphones off. So often, after an awesome evening of sexy fun, we would collapse into the car for the long ride home and say to ourselves, “Wow! What a night! If only we could tell somebody about that!”, and the stories started to bubble up inside us again.
Finally, we began to realize how much we missed telling our stories. We see now that this shared hobby enriched our lives in a similar way that the swinging lifestyle has and, after many long nights of soul searching, we agreed that we needed to dig the microphones out of the box in the basement and resume our show.
In this episode we re-introduce our podcast and explain our motivations for this program.
Our diary entry is a recent memory of an encounter with sexy listeners who made us proud of our influence on their lives and then turned the tables on us as the teachers became the students during a steamy evening of sexy, slippery fun.
The term “lifestyle” is so loosely used that lots of alternative interest groups claim to be in “The Lifestyle” but what does that mean? If swinging is a lifestyle, does it change the way you live? Does it change your attitudes about life and as a result can’t it become all-consuming and addictive?
In this episode we talk about the frequency of our swinging experiences and give some tips for avoiding burn out. We also reflect on how the swinging lifestyle has changed us for the better.
Our diary story is about a recent, unexpected, spur of the moment offer for play from a nameless couple we barely knew. Before we became comfortable with this lifestyle, we would never have been confident enough to accept their invitation, but we are so glad we did.
Click this link to listen to Episode 22:
Single men are a very complicated topic among swingers. Some couples are creeped out by them and avoid any contact and others specifically seek them out. Just like any other group of people, there are awesome single men and there are creeps in the lifestyle.
Although there are tons of options available to couples for play with a single man, in our experience, single guys who are charming, sexy, respectful, honest, clean, and charismatic are the real “unicorns”. In this episode we discuss the advantages and disadvantages of play with single men and give some suggestions and tips for how we select our single male playmates to avoid the weirdos and flakes.
Our sexy diary story is a memory of an encounter with a carefully selected single man and the MFM threesome that we enjoyed together. While there were awkward and uncomfortable moments, the experience was a unique and sexy one for us.
Click this link to listen to Episode 21:
Twenty episodes is a bit of a milestone for us. When we first began recording, we had no grand ambitions for our show, but we had information to pass on and so many fun memories that we wanted to share.
Swinging has been an awesome adventure for us and we are proud to advocate for its joys and benefits but just like any activity, even our favorite hobby has annoyances and frustrations. We pride ourselves on offering listeners candid, honest, practical tips and advice about swinging so in the interest of balance and transparency, and in honor of our 20th show; in this episode we discuss the top 20 things we DON’T like about the swinging lifestyle. Although in our swinging experience the good far outweighs the bad, in this show we indulge in a cathartic bitch session about our personal pet peves.
Our diary story is about our trip to Hedonism II in Jamaica and the fantastic rewards of looking past the inconveniences and annoyances that are inevitadbally part of any swinging experience.
Click this link to listen to Episode 20:
If we could subtitle this episode in our usual style of inquiry, the question of this show would be: “How could it be that sharing your spouse with someone could possibly enhance your marriage?” Its hard to put into words a clear explanation to that question so we hope this show’s account illustrates the answer.
In the swinging lifestyle its rare for us to find a connection with another couple in which all four of us are attracted intellectually, physically and emotionally to each other but recently it happened to us.
In this episode Mr. and Mrs. Jones of the We Gotta Thing Podcast join us for the second half of our bonus joint-podcasting event. The conversation begins on episode 13 of the We Gotta Thing Podcast. Be sure to listen to it first so you can pick up the conversation and sexy stories here in Part 2.
Click this link to listen to Episode 19:
We are back from Naughty in N’awlins 2015 and we have got some sexy stories to tell. This event created the first and largest collection of swinging lifestyle podcasters ever assembled in one place and it was awesome fun.
In this episode we discuss hotel takeovers and give some specific examples of how the NiN convention was an epic one. One of the unique experiences that we had at the event was the connection made with fantastic new friends, Mr. and Mrs Jones from the We Gotta Thing Podcast. As charming and sexy as we imagined them to be, they were in person.
While our diary story is about an sexy sixsome experience that occurred in the playrooms of NiN, we are honored to have a bonus diary story told by our new friends and the announcement of more collaboration soon to follow.
Click this link to listen to Episode 18:
Lets be totally honest, if you are not in a rock solid committed relationship, then swinging is probably not right for you. Most swingers are so secure in their own relationships that they have no interest in more than just social friendships with anybody but their partner. In the swinging lifestyle, nobody is looking to take anybody else’s spouse.
We all love many people in our lives and that love doesn’t diminish our commitment to our life partner. We love our family, our job and even our possessions, so loving our friends is natural and normal. In this episode we talk about friends with benefits, exclusive swinging relationships and swayers.
Our diary story is about an intimate and relaxing afternoon spent with a couple that have become very dear to us and how familiarity with great friends allows for exploration into play situations that we never knew we would even want to try.
Click this link to listen to episode 17:
Infamously, house parties are the most intense situation for play. They can be very intimidating but good house parties are often some of the most exciting experiences in the swinging lifestyle.
In this episode we talk about tips and suggestions that will help insure that you select the right party for you and give advice on how to get comfortable with the potentially high-pressure situations that are part of the house party scene.
In our sexy diary story we remember a great house party where we met a sexy couple and the challenges that we faced in playing with them in a typical house party situation where privacy isn’t always available.
Click this link to listen to Episode 16:
Back when we started swinging and everything was new and wild, we were easily intimidated, awed and even freaked out by some of the things we were exposed to and by some of the variety of sexual preferences that people seemed to enjoy. A new friend of ours once gave us some good advice to help encourage us to explore our interests. He told us… “Remember, its only kinky the first time.”
As an alternative sexual lifestyle, most people would probably consider swinging to be kinky, and in a way it is. After all, having consensual sex with people other than your spouse is kinky to most people, but what we have found its that the swinging world is only one part of a spectrum of amazing kinky worlds that exist. There are many parallel universes of kink that weave in and out of the swinging lifestyle. If you spend any time with swingers, you are bound to learn a little about some of them and maybe even be enticed to explore and experiment. We have been.
Our Diary story is about a few of our brushes with some colorful people in the kink scene and how they taught us that sometimes sex is about pushing your boundaries in order to enhance your pleasure.
Click this link to listen to Episode 15:
Like so many swingers, we started in this lifestyle by taking a chance and traveling to a distant, exotic location where we could just watch, learn and then eventually participate in the sexy fun. The experience was so amazing that we have returned many times and have had the pleasure of visiting most of the other lifestyle friendly resorts and events too. We travel often for sexy fun.
In this episode we answer the most frequently asked question from our email and discuss our recommendation for the best destination for your first swinging vacation.
Our journal entry this time is about the experience we had a couple of months ago as we hosted an impromptu birthday orgy in our Passion Suite at Desire. It was a sexy evening and the clean-up afterwards confirmed it!
Click this link to listen to Episode 14:
Inspired by questions from listeners about how we seemingly find so many awesome sexy people in our travels who become entries into our Swinger Diaries, on this episode we expose some of the truths about a few of our dating failures.
After all, while we do go on dates with other couples, of all the ways to meet potential play partners, we have found that a two-on-two date is the least probable to end in a connection.
Unfortunately, that high pressure situation is fraught with tension, overly eager optimism, nervous anticipation, and all too often, disappointment.
We actually have had a few successful dates and in our sexy journal entry, we remember one of our most favorite play experiences which really did begin with a rare situation; a fun, flirty, successful, couples date.
Click this link to listen to Episode 13:
We all know that practice makes perfect and since swingers have lots of sex, it would be a reasonable assumption that they are amazing lovers. While this point is true for some swingers, just like any other skill, some are better than others.
In this episode we discuss the skills and attitudes that make for a good lover. We also talk about the trickiness of having sex with new partners and the challenges and awkward situations which nervous excitement and distraction sometimes creates in the swinging lifestyle.
In our sexy diary journal entry, we remember answering a “Hot Date” listing and meeting an incredibly hot and experienced couple with whom we had such great bedroom communication, that we were able to venture into some wild new territory for us.
Click this link to listen to Episode 12:
If you are curious about the swinging lifestyle and you do any research, the most common advice found in articles, blogs or podcasts is, “Before you do anything, make sure to discuss your rules.” So, what exactly are these rules? Is there a checklist somewhere? How do you go about discussing your rules if you don’t know where to start?
Everybody has rules. The term “rules” is just a synonym for boundaries, limits or even preferences. In an effort to begin to explore the endless numbers of potential rules a couple could adopt, in this episode we talk about what we see as the 15 most common rules that should be discussed among newbies. Then in the spirit of our format, we give a description of our own personal position on each. While in no way an exhaustive list, it should give a good starting point for conversations with your partner and in so doing, help reduce the potential drama that can arise from getting into a situation for which you were not prepared.
In our diary story, we remember a time in which we were swept up in the hot steamy excitement of a group play situation without talking clearly with our playmates
about our rules. While it was sexy fun, it also resulted in a few unnecessary awkward moments.
Click this listen to Episode 11:
Flattered by messages and questions that we have received from our listeners, in this episode we answer one of the most frequently asked email inquiries. Many people wanted to know about the countless conversations and baby steps that moved us from being a faithful, conservative, monogamous couple who had never even fantasized about inviting others into our sex life, to becoming … that dreaded “S-word”.
Like most swingers, there was no pivotal moment or monumental decision that marked our entrance into the lifestyle. It was a slow gradual process and long probing conversations had with charming new friends that slowly coaxed into this amazing new exciting world.
In our sexy diary entry, we remember one of many steps in our journey. We recall the encounters that transitioned us from soft swap to full swap; the reasoning, conversations, rationale, excitement, intimidation, apprehension, and eventually the affect on our attitudes about sharing our sex life with others.
Click this link to listen to Episode 10:
Paige was not happy when the idea of these topics came up. Neither religion nor STIs are sexy conversation topics, but we know they are high on the list of curiosities and concerns when it comes to swinging. Originally, we had two separate topics, “Isn’t swinging against your religion?” and “Aren’t you worried about STDs?”, but Paige protested having two separate episodes about such unsexy topics so we combined them into one show.
As classic swingers, our views on these topics are more mainstream than you might realize. So many swingers are like us, professional churchgoing people, who are active members of their community, have kids and vanilla social lives, and work out at the gym and take care of themselves in an attempt to stay physically and emotionally healthy. In this show we talk about how religion fits into our swinging life and also about our observations about the risks and rewards involving STIs and the standard practices of prevention and protection in the swinging community.
Paige chooses the story for our journal as we remember a very recent hotel takeover where we had a date to meet up with old friends and the excitment of how our foursome turned into a wild and hot six-way connection with the introduction of new friends too.
Click this link to listen to Episode 09:
Many people imagine that swingers are just indiscriminate sex-crazed maniacs who are only interested in random hookups and wild orgies and while sex is a big part of the swinging lifestyle, the truth is that all swingers are actually very selective about who they wish to share their bodies with.
In this episode, we talk about how swinging is like dating for couples and just like in the dating scene, there are things that turn you on and turn you off about other people. Swingers are really looking for that rare and special connection even if its only for one night and sometimes that means that they have to be prepared to decline the invitations of others when it just doesn’t feel right.
In our sexy journal entry, we remember an adventurous night at one of our favorite swinger clubs in South Florida called Trapeze and the challenge of politely declining offers of play from aggressive people in the back play area that night.
Click this link to listen to Episode 08:
The fantasy of inviting a third person into your bed for sexy fun is the most common introduction into the swinging lifestyle. Usually this new playmate is a bisexual single woman to whom no commitments are expected other than carnal pleasure. In the swinging lifestyle these rare, desirable, beautiful, women are affectionately called unicorns. We’ve had the pleasure of play with many unicorns over the past few years and while every experience has been fun and sexy, threesomes have a tricky dynamic that should be considered before jumping right into that fantasy.
On this show we discuss who unicorns are, what they are looking for and how to find them. We explore the prevalence and preference of bisexual women and the spectrum of bisexuality in the lifestyle. We also spend some time talking about the unicorn’s male counterpart in the lifestyle, the single male, and the challenges that single men face among swingers.
Our diary entry is about an erotic afternoon spent with a gorgeous dear girlfriend who was a unicorn for the day. We took advantage of the opportunity to explore some of her kinky fantasies and to share her sexy body between us. While we prefer play with couples, in the right circumstances, riding a unicorn can be amazing!
Click this link to listen to Episode 07:
Its so sad that we have to hide the fact that we are swingers, but we do. The vanilla world is not ready to see our sexy adventures for what they are, an extension of our fantastic, loving, consensual, adoring, marital sexlife. Instead, most people imagine that all swingers are sexually addicted cheaters, who are easy, kinky and perverted. With that untrue and unfair reputation, we have no choice but to do what the majority of other swingers do and hide our lifestyle from friends, family, and co-workers.
In this episode, we talk about the challenges of hiding our secret sexy life and the fear of being discovered. We also suggest ways we’ve used to protect our anonymity and the unspoken agreement among swingers to honor everyone’s privacy.
In our journal entry we remember a passionate night of intense, sexy fun with a newly met couple in which the animal attraction was too powerful to resist.